Rethinking Selfish: Paying Attention to your Self-more

The Importance of Self-Care in a Giving Society!

Think on the times you may have being called selfish.  What did you do or say that garnered that comment? How did that comment make you feel?  Reflect on your actions or words that led to the accusation.  Prior to being called selfish, what were you trying to do/acquire?  Did the call-out of your being selfish change how you perceived yourself and your actions? Were you  trying to protect or build boundaries for yourself but instead was slapped with “selfish”? What did the accuser gain by calling you selfish?

Selfish

The word selfish is defined as, “lacking consideration for others - with the main concern being about personal profit or pleasure”.  Take note of some of the words that can be associated with selfish: uncaring, thoughtless, self-loving, introverted, unkind.  Here are some examples of words that are considered opposite of selfish; unselfish, selfless, considerate, generous.

Selfless/Unselfish

Selfless is defined as "showing great concern for other people and little or no concern for yourself," selflessness has long been championed as a cornerstone of human decency. Countless acts of heroism, charity, and kindness have been inspired by this spirit, shaping the very fabric of  societies.
Throughout human history, the notion of selflessness has been praised as one of the highest virtues. From ancient moral teachings to modern societal norms, the message is clear: prioritize the needs of others above your own. But what happens when this noble sentiment begins to overshadow the importance of self-care?  A vital aspect of human well-being often gets overlooked!

Let’s dissect this paradigm. Selflessness, as traditionally understood, entails a willingness to sacrifice one’s own needs for the  greater good. It's the parent who works multiple jobs to provide for their children, the caregiver who puts their own health at risk to tend to the sick, or the activist who devotes their life to a cause larger than themselves. Admirable as these acts may be, they often come at a cost – the neglect of one's own well-being.

It's crucial to differentiate between caring for others – a natural and essential aspect of human relationships – and the self-sacrifice that defines selflessness. The latter implies a suppression or denial of one's own needs in favor of others, a notion that can lead to burnout, resentment, and ultimately, diminished capacity to help others effectively. 

But what's the alternative? Am I advocating for a society of selfish individuals, solely focused on their own desires and aspirations? Absolutely not!  Our society needs  parents to provide for their children, caregivers who tend to the sick and activists who are change makers, etc.  Instead, I propose a paradigm shift towards self-care; the practice of actively safeguarding one's well-being and happiness.

Self-care

Self-care is not a selfish act; it's a fundamental pillar of personal sustainability. It encompasses a holistic approach to wellness, addressing physical, emotional, social, psychological, spiritual, financial, professional, and environmental needs. 

Whether it's taking a mental health day, prioritizing exercise, nurturing meaningful relationships, or seeking professional development, self-care encompasses a wide array of actions tailored to individual needs. By prioritizing self-care, we empower ourselves to show up fully – not only for others but also for ourselves. When we invest in our own well-being, we replenish our reserves of energy, compassion, and resilience, enabling us to contribute more effectively to the world around us. It's similar to the oxygen mask analogy – we must secure our own mask before assisting others.

Moreover, practicing self-care fosters a culture of compassion and reciprocity. When individuals prioritize their well-being, they model healthy behaviors for others, creating a ripple effect of positivity and support. Stronger, healthier individuals build stronger, healthier communities, creating a virtuous cycle of care and empowerment.

In our collective pursuit of a better world, let us not overlook the importance of self-care. It's not a luxury reserved for the privileged few but a fundamental right and responsibility for all. By embracing self-care, we honor the intrinsic value of every individual, recognizing that our well-being is not a zero-sum game but a shared endeavor.

So, the next time you find yourself teetering on the brink of self-sacrifice, pause and ask yourself: am I truly serving others by neglecting myself? In the tapestry of human kindness, let self-care be the thread that binds us all, weaving a narrative of compassion, resilience, and collective well-being. 

Share your comments, your perspectives, your incites, your inspirational quotes, songs, etc!  Let’s get better together! 

You cant help anyone if your dead from exhaustion, broke, hopeless, etc

Music 

I love Me, Meghan Trainor

About Damn Time, Lizzo

Flowers, Miley Cyrus

Subject To Change, Kelsea Ballerini

Call To Action(CTA)

• Think of a time that you believed someone when they called you selfish.  What was your reaction?  In hindsight, what might you have done differently?

• Do you see yourself as a selfless person and how does that make you feel?  If the feeling is not pleasant, how would you adjust your thinking or actions to reflect a more positive vibe for you?

• What does self care mean to you? How have you practiced selfcare in the past ?

• How might creating boundaries for yourself foster self care?

• Begin or continue to build a plethora of self-care options that you can turn to at any given point.